surrogacy Archives - Mothering in the Middle

D(olce) & G(abbana) Are Only Two Letters in DisGust (A Commentary on the D&G Scandal)

by Nicholas D'Ambra

Imagine Oprah saying in an interview that she didn’t think African-Americans deserved equal rights. Or, Gloria Steinem saying that women should be barefoot and pregnant.

Talk about taking way too many steps backward.

I’m not saying Dolce and Gabbana are as important as the two women above, especially in reference to those ladies’ fierce opinions and ardent support of their respective causes. D&G are, however, fashion icons with a platform to speak, and in the gay world (of which I’m a member), fashion is almost like a religion of sorts.

I find it interesting that people, like Dolce and Gabbana, who excuse their words under “freedom of speech,” are generally people who are espousing words of hate. I could completely see D&G’s point of view if they were some red state-heterosexual-morons with a complete lack of education and brain function. They are not, however, and that is what is so disturbing. […]

The Miracle of The (Multicultural) Holidays

by DeAnna Scott

This year I set up our Christmas tree and for the first time, I also put out my menorahs or as I’ve learned they are really called, Hanukkiahs. I’m not Jewish and neither is my husband, but my kids are as they were born to a Jewish woman who was our traditional surrogate named Jessica, or fondly referred to as “Chava.”

We have blended our families and together we make up a large and diverse group of individuals – both in tradition and in heritage. But, in the end we are simply family. And, during the holiday season no matter what traditions you follow, family, love and sweet fellowship are at the center of it all.

Since the beginning of our surrogacy journey, the connection between our future kids and Jessica, her family and her cultural and religious lineage were of the utmost importance to me. I gratefully made it my job as their mom to teach my kids the traditions and beliefs that are practiced on all sides of their family. Not just Christmas but also Hanukah, which is why I bought Hanukah candles while we were waiting for our photos with Santa.

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Happy First Year to My Twinsies

by DeAnna Scott

I’m exhausted. I am sitting here surrounded by birthday presents, picking pieces of Gigglebellies carrot cake out of my hair, feet aching from an afternoon of running around, stomach rumbling because I forgot to eat and two 1 year olds safely tucked away in their cribs. All in all, the first year birthday party was a complete success. The guests enjoyed themselves and we survived. The day wasn’t without its hiccups, but much like this first year, it has ended beautifully.

I honestly think part of my exhaustion this day is the emotional roller coaster I’ve been on these past several weeks remembering the journey that began one year and nine months ago. It was then we learned our surrogate, Jess, was pregnant with our twins. The absolute profoundness of our experiences, since we found out, makes me heady; weepy and excited, melancholy and cheerful – but totally intoxicated in awe and wonder! […]

Two Degrees of Separation: How My Surrogate’s Mother Became My Newborns’ Grandmother

by DeAnna Scott

Photo courtesy of DeAnna Scott

I know a woman. She is older than me, but not by too much. She is smart (a teacher). She is entertaining, loving, and kind with a gorgeous head of purple hair. She is my children’s grandmother – the only grandmother they have related to them by blood. But she is not my mother nor is she my husband’s mother.

She is our surrogate’s mother and I don’t know if she realizes how awesome we think she is and how grateful we are that she is our children’s grandmother. […]

Myths and Realities of Surrogacy

Karen Synesiou and Fay Johnson

Dear Reader: This is an update of a previous post. Given the increase in surrogates and surrogacy, we thought it important to present this comprehensive review of it all.

MYTH You have to be a couple to be able to have a child through surrogacy.

REALITY We are more and more seeing single women wishing to be Mothers coming to surrogacy. Please keep in mind that there still must be a medical necessity to ask another woman to take that risk for you. Many women can still carry a pregnancy even after their own eggs may no longer be viable. While eggs mayno longer be viable after the very early 40’s, you can still carry a pregnancy into your late 40’s. The average age of women in the U.S. carrying donor egg pregnancies is 44! We are also seeing many more single men becoming a parent through surrogacy. […]

Surrogacy: Myths and Realities

by Karen Synesiou

MYTH: The surrogate mother will keep my baby.
REALITY In the history of surrogacy in the USA there have been 65 cases documented of a couple not accepting their child. There have been 26 surrogate mothers that are recorded as having tried to change their mind over relinquishment. Surrogate mothers and their husbands are as much afraid of you not taking your child as you are afraid of them not giving it you.
REALITY There are reportedly over 22,000 documented surrogacy cases, less than 0.001% have resulted in disputes over relinquishment.
REALITY A surrogate mother can another have child of her own; she does not want yours. […]