If Only
by Peg O'Neill
I recently had to do something that is a difficult thing for most doctors, especially pediatricians: I attended the wake of one of my patients. While the death of a child is almost always premature, this was a particularly heart-wrenching story, of a healthy, happy ten year old boy, who died as a result of a tragic drowning accident, the details of which I still don’t know, but what I do know is that he was not wearing a life preserver. Perhaps, on that gorgeous, horrible summer day, if the current of the river on which he was tubing had been just a little gentler, or if the wind had been blowing on a slightly altered path, or if something else had been different, maybe he would be here today, playing baseball, cracking jokes, spending time outside in the neighborhood with his friends, as ten year old boys tend to do in our town when the weather is good. And while no one will ever know whether he would have been ultimately OK if he had been wearing a life preserver, this lingering question will likely forever haunt his family, and the rest of us: if only he had been wearing one, would he still be here? […]