Mothers over 40 Archives - Page 9 of 11

Introverted Mother

by Denise Naus

Being an introvert and a mother of three seem to be at odds with each other. As an introvert, I tend to crave quiet and ALONE perhaps more than my extroverted human counterparts might. And yet my young children are constantly here…and there…and… everywhere!

This is my fantasy “happy place” in my mind: I am alone in the forest. Alone in the cabin – miles from any civilization. It’s only me and the woodland creatures. The songs of birds, the calls of the wolves, and the occasional growl of a bear. There is no internet. No telephone. But there are books (many books)! There is pen and paper. And God. […]

One of Those Women? (In Honor of World Breastfeeding Week – 8/1 – 8/7)

by Ellie Stoneley

I’m old … a year away from 50 in fact. I’m a first time mother. I have an 18-month-old daughter. I drive along singing, “The Wheels on the Bus” even when she’s not in the car with me. I secretly love it when she wakes up needing me in the night, however tired I am. I am still breastfeeding her.

Right then, it would appear that, certainly according to much of the tabloid press, I’m practically the devil incarnate. A crazy breastfeeding, sagging old loon that a poor child has to put up with as a mother, a veritable harridan. Personally I don’t think I’m that bad. […]

Kids Keep You Young: The Myth

by Lori Shandle-Fox

You’ve always heard that kids keep you young. I want proof. Are there actual studies on this? I think not. I know that I’ve conducted my own studies and am here to report to you that it’s all a big myth. I admit, the core group I’ve focused on has consisted of a small informal gathering of neurotic people.

Case Study #1: My father-in-law. He has had neck and back issues for most of his adult life. To what does he attribute his cervical demise? One might guess the massive car accident that he had years ago that kept him in the hospital for months. According to him, that doesn’t even compare to teaching his children how to ride a bike. […]

Unearthing Diamonds at Midlife

by Lisa Garon Froman

Dear Reader: Please read author commentary and excerpts (in bold) from her new book, Tao Flashes.

For some reason, I’ve always been drawn to rocks. Maybe it’s my inner nerd, but I love the colors, the jagged edges, the imperfect lines, the untold stories and the history behind them. Even now as an adult, I collect rocks when I’m on vacation; I pluck them up from my path and save them as colorful mementos from my adventures. When I view them later, it’s like looking at a vacation photo. I am whisked back in time to the place, to the moment where I uncovered my piece of earth. And it brings me peace.

At midlife, I’m a lot more concerned about being peaceful than I was when I was younger. Caught up in the frantic day-to-day, gotta get it done–and get it done well–mode, I accepted a certain amount of chaos as the norm. As long as my son was happy, or safe, my happiness or peacefulness didn’t matter so much. […]

The PTSD of Adoptive Parents

by Michelle Eisler

Emotions are celebrated and repressed, analyzed and medicated, adored and ignored — but rarely, if ever, are they honored – Karla McLaren

I was driving to my doctor’s appointment when the morning radio host began talking about the second anniversary of the earthquake in Haiti. I had awakened that morning feeling fragile, and chalked it up to needing to adjust my hormones. I felt thankful that I was heading to the doctor.

But, suddenly, at the mention of the earthquake, I began crying, and found it hard to stop. Here I was seeing a collage of pictures and images I had seen on CNN during the weeks we felt helpless as we fought to bring my daughter home. Something I thought I had moved beyond was suddenly rearing its ugly head. […]

On Failure, Forgiveness and Cutting Ourselves Some Slack

by Peg O'Neill, M.D.

Dear Reader: This is a reprint of a previous post.

We forgot about “Gotcha Day.” In the world of adoptive families, this is a significant faux-pas. “Gotcha Day” is the celebration of bringing a non-biologic child into the family. For us, it commemorates the day our family became whole; the day that my husband and I were given the gift of our precious child and entered the challenging world of raising multiple boys, with all the craziness, motion, joy and exhaustion.

For my older son, it was the day he became a sibling and began his journey as a big brother. For my adoptive son, though he was just six months old when he joined our family forever, it is akin to a birthday – a momentous event, a beginning, a symbol of who he is, at least in part. […]

Daycare Director

by Andrea Lynn

I had the most disarmingly honest conversation with the director of Anna’s new preschool yesterday. Like all good preschools around here, there had been a long waiting list. I didn’t have a hope of getting in. But I lamented to a mom friend about my hopeless hunt for good childcare, and, God bless her, she leaned in and said “You know, I might be able to help.” There might be a spot, she said, at her daughter’s preschool, as she graduated to public school. Did I want her to put a word in? Oh yes, please. […]

Needing Our Mothers At Mid-Life

by Susan Paget

For those of you who are midlife moms to little kids, you might want to skip this blog because I’ve got another dose of reality to toss your way and I know you’ve already got enough on your plate.

If you’re still here, brace yourself.

There’s no expiration date to this “mom” thing. […]

Mistaken Identity and a Big Mistake

by Ellie Stoneley

I guess it had to happen one day …

17 months have passed since she was born. I was 47 then, I’m (just) 49 now. Many people have congratulated me on my beautiful, funny, chatting, waving, singing, dancing daughter. And then, finally, along with the sunshine came the question that the media would like to think that I (as an ‘older mother’) get asked all the time. “Are you her Grandmother?” Oddly it wasn’t just once but twice in the same day … and both times by other (older-looking) women. […]

Old Enough for Gratitude

by Andrea Lynn

My mother just dodged a cancer scare. My uncle is in the middle of one. My brother is having heart problems, and on Sunday I rushed my 2-year-old into the ER with an allergic reaction, that, thank God, resolved itself in a few hours without much medical intervention. So far, fingers crossed, everyone is fine. But it is that time of life when I’m feeling like we’re living on very shaky foundations, and no one should be taking anything for granted. […]