Mothers over 40 Archives - Page 10 of 11

A Community of Mid-Life Mother Bloggers (In Celebration of Mother’s Day)

by Cyma Shapiro

Nine years ago, while sitting in the Moscow Marriott at age 46 with my newly adopted year-old daughter, I realized that I was going to be old when she graduated from college. The “old” was nearly my grandmother’s age – old! This was the very first time I’d ever felt my mortality and had ever even stopped to consider my chronological age. I had long ignored the biological clock theory thinking that it was mere hyperbole.

Although it came as a shock to me that I had not previously become pregnant, on that cold winter’s night nearly 9,000 miles from home, I finally felt my life begin. My age was a nagging problem, but at that moment I was filled with pride, joy and the fullness of starting a new family. I could see nothing but rosy times. Or so I thought. Little did I know that I had just joined a new club – moms over 40 – with no dues-paying members and no glue to bind them. Little did I know that in reality, I was one of them. (Two years later, we adopted our son).

Since then, I’ve made it my mission to expose the world to the group I call “Midlife Mothers” – that is, women choosing motherhood over 40. I have been featured on NPR and written for numerous online sites including Psychology Today and the Huffington Post. MLM entities MotheringintheMiddle.com and NURTURE: Stories of New Midlife Mothers (the only art gallery show dedicated to presenting women choosing motherhood over 40; now traveling North America) are intended to present a voice, face and forum.

Together with other midlife mother/women bloggers, we are helping redefine women in mid-life, dispel myths about who we are […]

Sticks and Stones

by Ellie Stoneley

Dear Reader: Our very own UK-based Ellie Stoneley has been shortlisted for the prestigious Brilliance in Blogging award for her blog, Mush Brained Ramblings.

Here is her latest work:

“Sticks and stones may break my bones But names will never hurt me”

This pearl of wisdom, attributed to a Mrs George Cuppples in something called Tappy’s Chicks back in 1872, is now part of nursery folklore.

I’ve never been particularly bothered by names or labels, which is probably just as well. I always wanted to be known as Beth (inspired by sweet gentle Beth from Little Women), but that never stuck, instead I ended up with Ellie as a result of my brother singing his version of (N)ellie the elephant very gleefully when my mother plated my hair into tight braids behind my ears which then stuck out at right angles.

I married in my mid forties (maybe the ears had put people off before that) and a few months before the wedding, was referred to by someone as a ‘spinster’ that’s one of the few names I have objected to … not long after that I became a “Mrs.,” a label that seems somehow too grown up for me and I’ve never quite got the hang of. Then, by an utter miracle, just over four years later, I became a mother. […]

Motherhood, with Gratitude

by Andrea Lynn

Kristi and children by photographer Tracy Cianflone

I finally saw the NURTURE: Stories of New Midlife Mothers* photo exhibit. I’ve seen many of the photos on the website, of course, and knew about the project before I started blogging here. I consider the creator of this whole Midlife Mothering project an old friend, though I suppose it has only been a few years. But, seeing the photos in real life, and reading the stories of the mothers and their children in black and white, was different.

We read so much online now, it seems rare to be standing before a real photo, much larger than my computer screen, and reading the stories in person, as others shuffled around me, sharing the exhibit space in downtown Toronto. […]

Walk the Talk (A Commentary)

by Wendy Sue Noah

Life with five precious children by my side has inspired me to be the best person I can be so that my children have a role model to follow as they make bigger and bigger choices in their own lives.

I didn’t have a role model growing up. And, so, I found myself in many dark corners trying to figure out where to shine my light. Or, trying to figure out where my light was hiding. […]

Is Infertility Awareness Week for Me, Too? (Infertility Awareness Week – 4/21 – 4/27/2013)

by Jenilyn Gilbert LCSW

The 28 year old woman who is told ‘adoption is your only option’; the mother who wants to add another child to her family but feels guilty that others don’t have their first child yet; the 42-year-old woman who questions whether the diagnosis of infertility even applies to her, are all women who belong to this club of wanting to be mothers, but within this reluctant membership, there are subcultures, divided by age and diagnosis. In an already isolating experience, is it healthy to divide ourselves further? […]

Five Whole Foods to Help Banish Wrinkles

by Kris T. Smith

Who wants to look years younger than your actual age? Most of you do, admit it. It’s hard keeping up with all these magic creams, night serums and day serums. Besides, are they really good for your skin? And do they really work as well as the manufacturers advertise? If you read the labels on a lot of them, they are filled with harmful chemicals that you should be avoiding anyway. What you need to be doing is protecting your skin from the free radicals floating around in the environment and bombarding your skin.

What if there was a way to get rid of those pesky wrinkles naturally? If you increase your intake of foods filled with natural anti-oxidants and anti-inflammatory agents, you will find you have better results. Would you be able to follow a diet like this? Here are five foods you can eat that will help banish those wrinkles and give you younger looking skin.

1. Blueberries

The U.S. Department of Agriculture says that blueberries are higher in anti-oxidant properties than strawberries by approximately 40 percent. Remember the anti-oxidants protect your skin from the free radicals from the environment that are constantly attacking your skin. They are also full of vitamin C, which encourages the growth and formation of collagen. Collagen renewal helps keep the skin looking younger and also decreases the effects of aging. […]

FDA Approves Drug For Sexual Pain

Ladies, we have one more tool in the belt.

Last month, the US Food and Drug Administration (FDA) approved a new drug to treat the vaginal and vulvar pain associated with loss of estrogen in older women.

That pain is called dyspareunia, and it’s caused by the changes in the vagina and genitals that occur when we lose estrogen during menopause. As we’ve said (often), our vaginal tissues become thin, dry, and fragile as our estrogen levels decline, which can make sex very uncomfortable. Dyspareunia is common, and it doesn’t get better on its own. […]

Birthday Parties with Special Needs…

by Julia Garstecki

Raising a child with a special need certainly has its ups and downs. An impending birthday party, either for your child or a peer, can be a roller coaster ride of emotions for both you and your child. With creative planning and realistic expectations, your child can be a part of the fun.

If you are hosting….

Let your child guide the planning. What does your child like? What are they able to do? If your child doesn’t like chaos on a daily basis, they certainly won’t have fun with a house full of kids amped up on cake and ice-cream! You can still decorate and get a cake, even if there are only a few guests to make it special. […]

Six Things Adoptive/Foster Families Need When New Children Arrive

by Lisa Qualls

This was the question,

What would have helped you the most in the early weeks and months of adding a child to your family through adoption or foster care? If somebody had asked you, “What can I do to help?” and you were able to answer anything at all with no shame, guilt, or concern about whether they really would want to do it, what would it have been?

This is what you answered:

Bring Food

Many of you stated that having meals delivered allowed more time to focus on all of your children, but also gave you some contact with “the outside world.” It does not have to be dinner, as somebody said, even bringing cut-up fruit would help. Someone else mentioned having dinner brought by friends who then shared the meal and spent the evening with them. One person wrote that when they adopted a baby, friends brought meals, but when they adopted an older child people assumed it wasn’t as demanding and didn’t bring meals. I think we can safely say that every adopting/foster family will be blessed by meals. […]

The Sweet Surrender of Sleep

by Jennifer Magnano

Sleep always seems to come most easily to those in great fatigue in every place and space of being. All of our “bodies” – physical, spiritual, emotional, mental – are finally depleted. It so appears that only at this very moment, when we have nothing left to give and are completely “fried,” that we just might be able to rest… and rest well. Yet, this often is not the case. Most nurturers don’t experience really great slumber. Restless or chronically overtired, it is with great uncertainty that we reach out to the blissful edge of sweet surrender. […]