by Karen C. Hug-Nagy
Becoming a first time Mom of twins at age forty-five was like viewing a meteor shower in space, an amazing sight! Within an instant, I could sense a shift in my current orbit. I suspected something was about to change, and it did, with a loud BANG! […]
At this time of year, I am filled with a sadness that the end of summer brings, the anticipation and hope for the coming fall, and a sense of introspection that the Jewish New Year – Rosh Hashonah – offers. For many Jews, this holiday (which begins tomorrow tonight) is intended to provide an intense reflection of the past year – self-examination and sincere repentance for past transgressions and harmful motivations, forgiveness and acceptance, and the chance to make things “right” – in this case, for our fate to be sealed in the Book of Life. […]
by Julie Donner Andersen
Being pregnant with baby number three – my midlife “oops” – was about as much fun as a funeral, and the responses to the news of our baby’s impending arrival were often just as depressing. Instead of the gasps and hugs by teary-eyed well-wishers the other pregnancies had solicited, this pregnancy was greeted with responses such as “Oh, I’m so sorry!” or “Better you than me!” It was as if I had just informed them that I was dying and not welcoming a new chapter in the book of our family by means of extending it.
I felt about as welcomed as a leper at our friends’ homes. No one patted my swollen tummy like a Buddha, hoping luck would rub off on him or her, as they had with my other pregnancies. Instead, our friends made hex signs with crossed fingers and said weird things like, “Hmm…wonder what’s in the water? I’M not drinking it!” or “Stay away from me! Your condition might be catchy!” No one wanted to feel this baby move, since that was old hat, too. Instead, they shot me sympathetic looks while secretly hoping my bladder would withstand the internal soccer match so I wouldn’t pee all over their sofas. […]
by Vivian Diller Ph.D
Although originally used by psychologists to describe a transitional stage in adult development, today the midlife crisis is often associated with the guy in his 40s who finds a young girlfriend and runs off in his new sports car; or the woman, about the same age, who reinvents herself, buys a new wardrobe — and sometimes buys a new face. Is it a myth? An excuse for impulsive, bad behavior and unrealistic transformations? Or is it a reality in need of a new name, given recent changes in contemporary culture? […]
by Adam Pertman
My son was three years old and my daughter had lived on this Earth for just two months when I met Sheila Hansen. She’s a tall, soft-spoken woman who laughs easily and exudes warmth when she speaks; she has the kind of comfortable self-confidence that immediately makes you think she’d make a loyal friend and a good mother. On that muggy July day, sitting in the conference room of a church in southern New Jersey, she told me a story that chilled me to the bone and forever altered the way I think about my adopted children, about birth parents, and about the country in which I grew up. […]
by Heather Griffiths
At the age of 30 I had my son; my daughter at 32. YES, Yes… I know – I’m a baby by most of your standards at the not so “tender” age of 35, and not officially a midlife mother. You see, by my family’s track record, my two older sisters were working on kids # 2 and 3 respectively by the time they were 25, so for me I thought waiting until I was 30 was waiting. Looking back now I see that I naively thought I had everything together. But, I am still racked with self doubt and the simple question of “What if” and the not so simple answers it often conjures. […]
by Valerie Gillies
Autumn is the eternal corrective. It is ripeness and color and a time of maturity; but it is also breadth, and depth, and distance. What man can stand with autumn on a hilltop and fail to see the span of his world and the meaning of the rolling hills that reach the far horizon? Hal Borland
Here I am, sitting at the computer trying to write something coherent, while inches away my thirteen year old is melting down at the prospect of the first day of school tomorrow. The ostensible issues: backpack size and choice of clothing for the morning. (Truth: nervous beyond belief.) Another, down the hall, is supposed to be packing for a year abroad, but has abandoned a room that could land me with a health code violation, in order to help her friend pack up for school. And, in the room vacated by my eldest daughter are the beginnings of a wedding gown that I should be working on. […]
by Jane Samuel
As my children can attest, I am not much of a TV person. I think it siphons away needed brain cells and deprives our lives of valuable time. Nonetheless, when tethered to the elliptical for my workouts I am known to watch a little and one show that I often surf to is TLC’s A Baby Story. I find myself nervously pacing (well, sort of ellipticaling) beside the anxious dads, beaming eagerly with the expectant grandparents or panting and pushing along with the moms. […]
by Karen Hug-Nagy
I think my current mindset has all the markings of a midlife mothering crisis. It’s difficult to describe just what a midlife crisis feels like. Lately I’ve heard it termed a midlife transition, which sounds less frightening to me. I think I’m currently stuck in one of those transitions. My 10 year old twins are in fifth grade, so that means I gave birth to them at age 45, and if I do the math right, that would put me at about age, 55! […]
