MotheringintheMiddle.com Archives - Page 20 of 25

A Call to Duty (In Honor of Breast Cancer Awareness Month)

by Jane Samuel

Sometime in the fall I missed my call to duty. The reminder letter came reminding me that I was due for my annual mammogram. But I thought, or maybe hoped, that I wasn’t due for another six months. Seriously, it seemed like just a few months ago I had been there. So I put the letter aside with plans to call and confirm it was indeed time. But time got away from me and before I knew it Spring was knocking on the door and my doctor was asking me why I hadn’t had my mammogram in the fall. Ooops. […]

The Older Cousins

by Andrea Lynn

My brother and I are only 21 months apart, so for most of our lives, he went first and I followed soon after. School, swimming lessons, learning to drive, off to university. I`d watch him go, and take mental notes, and I`d be along, two years later. We were a little competitive, but different enough in interests and personalities that it never got out of hand. I confess that when we both graduated and started our first jobs, we compared salaries for a while. I`d be ahead by a few thousand, and then he`d catch up. But then he had a period of unemployment and comparisons became unseemly – good thing, because now I`d have to double my pay to get anywhere near his. While he was unemployed, he went back to school to get his executive MBA, to add to his engineering degree. Which was, as it turned out, a sound financial decision. […]

Step 2 (Journey of a New Foster-to-Adopt Midlife Mom)

I swear it took a full ten days, if not more, for the social service agency to call me. I was starting to think they would not call, but they did, or rather, she did. The foster-parent recruiter or something like that left me a message. I waited one full day (gulp) before I called her back. It was Friday. I was calling her cell phone number, but she was not working. She was, however, in the shower. This was not going well, I fretted.

[…]

Freezing My Eggs – II (Part IV of V)

by MeiMei Fox

18 Buns in the Icebox

The bad news is I feel like crap. My ovaries ache when I walk (I kid you not—it is a bizarre sensation). My rock-hard stomach juts out so much that I can’t fit into my pants. The discomfort in my belly region has kept me up every night this week. […]

In Praise of Older Mothers

by Barbara Hannah Grufferman

Full disclosure: I am an older mother. My first daughter was born when I was almost 38, and my youngest entered the world three days before my 41st birthday. Even though I’m 54 and going through the tumultuous teenage years, I wouldn’t have it any other way. […]

In Honor of World Menopause Day – October 18th

by Valerie Gillies

I was probably the only person alive who wasn’t aware that October 18^th is World Menopause Day. World. Can you imagine?

It took me back a bit. Who on earth would have thought this was something to commemorate? What am I missing? I suppose it could be the contribution hot flashes make to global warming, the hormonal swings, perhaps the amazing determination the female body can show in hanging onto every single calorie it ingests and instantaneously storing it as fat on what used to be a waistline. But no, although those features of ‘the change’ are truly awe inspiring, I will take it that it is about finally saying goodbye to a not so wanted friend, that sweet feeling of relief upon closing the door after a houseguest has overstayed her welcome. […]

Give Up the Blame Game and Try Forgiving for Conception

by Cynthia Wilson James

Seldom does a month go by that I don’t talk to a woman who hasn’t tormented herself for not being able to get pregnant over 35 or 40. The reasons vary, but the popular ones are not marrying the right man, marrying too late, not paying attention to her biological clock and paying too much attention to her career-oriented. […]

Freezing My Eggs – Part I

Note to the Reader: We are honored to feature three of Huffington Post writer MeiMei Fox’s five posts regarding her recent experiences with egg freezing, commonly called “oocyte cryopreservation.” MeiMei shares her personal experiences in an effort to spread awareness of this fertility option to other women her age. Please do not consider it a substitute for advice from a medical professional.

The Box

This morning, a FedEx box arrived containing $3,300 worth of medications. And so begins the process of freezing my eggs.

“It’s a miracle!” says my best friend Jen, the mother of two. And I agree. […]

The Truth About Childless Women

Melanie Notkin

Nearly 46 percent of American women through age 44 are childless. That’s up from 35 percent in 1976.

All reasons this generation of women are not bearing children at the same rate their mothers did are valid. Some are young women and just not at a point in their lives where motherhood is a choice they’d like to make. Some are ‘fence-sitters,’ not sure about whether or not they want children. Some are childfree by choice. Some are gay and need to take a potentially longer and less traditional route to motherhood. Some are suffering from biological infertility. And some, like me, are what I call “circumstantially infertile.” […]

Baby Steps: The Journey of a (Brand-New) Foster-to-Adopt Mom

Dear Reader, this is the first in a series by a 54-year-old single, childless woman who is in the beginning stages of pursuing foster-to-adopt. She is excited. She is scared. She is also a midlife woman. We will follow her journey to the end! To that aim, she will remain anonymous until it unfolds. We will then reveal her name, her child’s name and any other details necessary to complete her story.

I made the call today. I have been thinking about it for five years.

I have thought about becoming a foster parent ever since I moved to my state. But there were always reasons to wait. My dad was sick, I was in school, and most importantly, I did not have a partner – a man – in my life. I always wanted to create a family, in the traditional sense. Five years later, still no man. I am now 54. My dad has passed away, my mom recently passed as well. My brother’s family had also been my extended family and greatest supporter. Now he is divorced; my nephew has moved away to college; my youngest niece is living in another state with her mother. […]