Carly Seifert Archives - Mothering in the Middle

Books That Celebrate Diversity

by Carly Seifert

I’m the mom of two very different-looking children. My 5-year-old daughter has pale, porcelain skin, big blue eyes and straight blonde hair. My 1-year-old son is the color of espresso and boasts a Teeny Weeny Afro of tight, perfect ringlets.

As a transracial family in a predominantly white community, my children attract their fair share of questions and comments. I take very seriously the importance of educating and empowering my kids about their differences, helping them to recognize and celebrate what makes them unique and giving them the tools to deal with these situations as they grow. One of my favorite ways to create an open dialogue as we explore together is by reading children’s books that focus on diversity. Here are some of our favorites (and please visit my blog for reviews of more children’s titles that celebrate multiculturalism and adoption!):

1. All the Colors of the Earth by Sheila Hamanaka: This beautiful book has simple text and rich illustrations that celebrate children from all backgrounds and ethnicities, pointing out that love comes in many colors and forms.

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What’s Missing in Our Children’s Books (A Commentary)

by Carly Seifert

I am visiting my brother at his apartment in downtown Los Angeles. My two children and I are on our way down to our car to drive up to the Valley for the day so they can meet their two cousins — bilingual twins of Mexican descent — for the first time.

We step into the apartment elevator and make conversation with a friendly Jewish Rabbi, who is on his way to a conference. We are soon joined by two chatty African American teenagers, who fawn over my African American son’s dimples, much to his delight. When we reach the parking garage, there are two Asian American women in suits getting into the car next to us, discussing a legal case that one of them is representing.

I love the diversity we experienced in those five minutes. […]

Books for Adoptive Moms and Their Children

by Carly Seifert

As I navigate this crazy journey of being an adoptive mother, I have found that books have been one of my most valuable resources. For me — books are what give me guidance, sanity and a little bit of solidarity. For my kids — books help them feel empowered as they grasp unique situations and concepts.

I’d like to share with you some of my favorite books that focus on building a connection with your child as you celebrate their stories and uniqueness:

1. The Connected Child by Karyn Purvis: Since I can’t have the Wise and All-Knowing Dr. Karyn Purvis following me around my house and helping me deal with every situation, this book is the next best thing. If you read no other book about adoption, READ THIS ONE. It will help you build compassion and connection (hence the title) with your child.

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10 Things NOT to Say to Adoptive Parents

by Carly Seifert

A few days ago my 10 months pregnant friend at The Measured Mom posted a great list of things NOT to say to a pregnant woman, and politely suggest some alternatives. I laughed out loud reading some of them, remembering how many of them were said to me — and, shamefully, how many I have said to my pregnant friends, since I have forgotten what it’s like to walk around with another human being inside of you!

When I’m with my fellow adoptive girlfriends, you will often hear us say, “Oh, you won’t believe this one!” as we share the latest offensive thing someone has said to us. But just as I’ve been guilty of saying, “You look like you’re ready to pop!” to my overdue pregnant friends without meaning to make them feel worse simply because I’ve only been pregnant once and have forgotten all about it, other well-meaning people say some of the things on this list simply because they’ve never adopted and don’t know what else to say…or not say. […]