The November Dilemma
November has always seemed to me to be like a crossroad month. It is both fall and winter in its weather. But essentially November for most of us means a time for thanks as we gear up for the upcoming holidays and a time for grieving as we officially let go of Autumn’s beauty and move into the more stark landscape.
November begins on the first with an acknowledgment of a religious holiday, All Souls Day, or as the nuns used to say, the cleansing of that horrible day prior, Halloween. But what is it about November that leaves us lingering, in the beginning of the month, lost and fragile? What is it about November that leaves us feeling delicate and brittle? How can we make sense in this preparation month, of our crazy, busy “to do” lists? But more importantly, why can’t we enjoy it for what it is; a kind, gentle introduction to the mayhem to come.
The March Toward “The Real Holiday”
As both a teacher and a mother of a middle school student, I have noticed that November is the opposite of March, it comes in like a pumpkin(quiet and resolved) and goes out like a turkey(squawking and pissed). What does that mean for our mindset and the mindset of our children? For many of us, after the sugar high has resolved itself, our kids want to get to Thanksgiving as quickly as possible so that the “real” holidays can begin. How sad. How have gratefulness and the “counting of our blessings” become a pre-game to Black Friday?
Why November Matters
Thanksgiving is of course the holiday of the month, but what about the other 29 days of this forgotten month. Summer clothes have officially found their way to storage, and the hall closet has been stocked with the season’s gloves and hats, all in anticipation of the upcoming winter season. Yet there is that in between time that beckons our attention. What is between the grieving and the gratefulness? It is the opportunity for reflection. November is generally a quiet month. It doesn’t require us to hustle and bustle. It may be chilly but it is not downright hardcore like February. It is a time to revisit our hopes for change. November is the month that allows us to take stock, both of what we have and what we hope for. This is why it is imperative that we take it back.
Beauty and the Beast
In the Northeast, November can mean a number of things. It can be a time of preparation or it can be a time of consideration. It can be a time of grieving and a time of gratefulness. I know that these days, Christmas starts in September and there is very little attention given to the most holy, in my opinion, of holidays – the one that gives thanks and requires no material wealth to attend. Last year was the first year that Black Friday actually started happening on Thanksgiving Thursday. How have we let this happen? Where does it end?
Perhaps we should do away with the entire holiday and month and just let the consumer holiday take over on “all souls day.” Now, wouldn’t that be the irony of it all. I know that I struggle every year with my son, hoping that this will be the year that he “gets it” – that this will be the year that we take that day, that moment, that entire month, to universally respond, rejoice, and recognize all that we have and all that we can give.
“The month of November makes me feel that life is passing more quickly. In an effort to slow it down, I try to fill the hours more meaningfully” – Henry Rollins