Mothering contributor DeAnna Scott, 48, is the mother of twins, Robert and Phoebe (born via a traditional surrogacy in June 2013). DeAnna is a p/t photographer and full-time mom. We will feature her work on a monthly basis.
by Nicholas D'Ambra
It happened two months ago that our lives changed drastically. We were two Dads and a beautiful five-year old boy. Two and a half men. We were way passed diapers and pre-chewed food (sometimes that stuff smelled as bad going in as it did coming out). Things were moving along rather smoothly and we had finally found our rhythm. Our son was graduating from preschool on Friday and the Wednesday before was his last day of “class.”
There I was, a grown man standing in Starbucks after dropping him off for the last time at our beloved preschool, tears coming down behind my Wayfarers ( a retro-nod to the days when I thought I was cool…I never was BTW). Friday’s graduation was going to be embarrassing. An Irish-like Keening seemed inevitable. […]
by Nicolas D'Ambra
by DeAnna Scott
I’m exhausted. I am sitting here surrounded by birthday presents, picking pieces of Gigglebellies carrot cake out of my hair, feet aching from an afternoon of running around, stomach rumbling because I forgot to eat and two 1 year olds safely tucked away in their cribs. All in all, the first year birthday party was a complete success. The guests enjoyed themselves and we survived. The day wasn’t without its hiccups, but much like this first year, it has ended beautifully.
I honestly think part of my exhaustion this day is the emotional roller coaster I’ve been on these past several weeks remembering the journey that began one year and nine months ago. It was then we learned our surrogate, Jess, was pregnant with our twins. The absolute profoundness of our experiences, since we found out, makes me heady; weepy and excited, melancholy and cheerful – but totally intoxicated in awe and wonder! […]
by DeAnna Scott
Photo courtesy of DeAnna Scott
I know a woman. She is older than me, but not by too much. She is smart (a teacher). She is entertaining, loving, and kind with a gorgeous head of purple hair. She is my children’s grandmother – the only grandmother they have related to them by blood. But she is not my mother nor is she my husband’s mother.
She is our surrogate’s mother and I don’t know if she realizes how awesome we think she is and how grateful we are that she is our children’s grandmother. […]
Karen Synesiou and Fay Johnson
Dear Reader: This is an update of a previous post. Given the increase in surrogates and surrogacy, we thought it important to present this comprehensive review of it all.
MYTH You have to be a couple to be able to have a child through surrogacy.
REALITY We are more and more seeing single women wishing to be Mothers coming to surrogacy. Please keep in mind that there still must be a medical necessity to ask another woman to take that risk for you. Many women can still carry a pregnancy even after their own eggs may no longer be viable. While eggs mayno longer be viable after the very early 40’s, you can still carry a pregnancy into your late 40’s. The average age of women in the U.S. carrying donor egg pregnancies is 44! We are also seeing many more single men becoming a parent through surrogacy. […]
by Karen Synesiou
MYTH: The surrogate mother will keep my baby.
REALITY In the history of surrogacy in the USA there have been 65 cases documented of a couple not accepting their child. There have been 26 surrogate mothers that are recorded as having tried to change their mind over relinquishment. Surrogate mothers and their husbands are as much afraid of you not taking your child as you are afraid of them not giving it you.
REALITY There are reportedly over 22,000 documented surrogacy cases, less than 0.001% have resulted in disputes over relinquishment.
REALITY A surrogate mother can another have child of her own; she does not want yours. […]
