Reinventing Ourselves Archives - Page 12 of 14

Embracing It All (You Can Call Me Grandma!)

by Cyma Shapiro

Dear Reader: I often write about the pitfalls and achievements of new older motherhood; the angst of moving into menopause; the knowledge that being over-50 means that the end post is right straight ahead, and in plain sight.

But, today, I’m writing about enlarging our family. No, despite many sleepless nights over this topic, we will not be adding any more children to our family. However, we are adding another member, of sorts. Today, I’m writing about my older son, who appears smitten with …let’s call her “Lady Godiva.” I am happy for him; he (and she) seems happy. I envision a wedding and all the rest of it coming my way – much sooner than later. […]

Eight Tips for Single Parents Going Back to School

Making it through college can be a challenge for any of us—add to that the responsibility of being a single parent and college can be especially demanding. Dr. Bill Burns, director of the North Dakota State University Counseling Center, and Maggie Pearl, admissions manager at Rasmussen College—Fargo campus, share some of their tips for helping single parents be successful students and parents. […]

Women and the Art of Play

by Rosemary Lichtman Ph.D. and Phyllis Goldberg Ph.D.

We all know about the importance of play for the emotional growth and development of children. It can enhance their imagination, increase social skills and boost self-confidence. So why don’t we place more value on play for ourselves? According to a recent study by the Families and Work Institute, over one half of American women don’t have enough time to spend on themselves and to choose the activities they enjoy. […]

Full Circle

by Peg O'Neil, M.D.

“I can do it myself!” says my six-year-old, as he swings his leg up the high bottom branch of the cherry tree in our front yard. I have just given him a barely perceptible, gentle nudge to help him get where he wants to be, but it’s clear that he doesn’t want this. I need to back off. What he really wants at this point is for me to be there, to cheer him on and observe his triumph. […]

Tears

by Valerie Gillies

“Something came out from my heart into my throat and then into my eyes” – Jean Rhys

I always excelled at staring contests. It’s a cultivated skill. Without too much effort, I can turn everything off, blank out, and suspend time. It works great for balancing yoga poses. And I have to say that even though it’s probably not the optimal way to approach the milestones of life, it works for me in its own crooked way. […]

The Long Wave Goodbye

Dear Reader: Today is the the last day of school for my two youngest children. Tomorrow, they will begin the long summer wait for the next school year to start. This cyclical passing of time is short-lived, I know, punctuated by those all-familiar rituals which change as they (and I) age. This essay is in homage to them and the reality that time is truly fleeting…

Today, I waved to both my daughter and son as they rode away on the school bus. It was the silly kind of wave – two arms flailing, and me jumping up and down as if I was flagging down a passing ship. I made the heart sign to them and blew them both a kiss. We all continued waving until the bus was out of sight. Walking back to my house, I had a lump in my throat. I am so sad. The times they are a’changing… […]

The Father Fix (From a Single Mother by Choice)

Andrea Lynn

Father’s Day has never been a big deal in our house. My girls are too young to know the occasion exists, since they are still at home and sheltered from both Hallmark and earnest preschool teachers. But my legion of Single Mothers By Choice friends all have tales to tell about school projects mislabeled to “daddy” and efforts to substitute variations of grandpa and uncle on hand-written cards and macaroni photo frames. It is an annual discussion that is sometimes painful but mostly handled in stride. I’m pretty sure Jewish kids have more trouble with Christmas than fatherless children have trouble with Father’s Day, though perhaps I’m in denial. […]

The Journey to Bitch and Back

by Peg O'Neill, M.D.

Mother’s Day was a little different for me this year. During my past decade-plus of Mother’s Days, my general approach, similar to that of many of us who wear these shoes, has been that this is a day for my children and husband to appreciate me. But this year, I decided that I needed to mix it up a little bit. […]

Just Being A Mother

by Cyma Shapiro

Dear Reader: This is another reprint of a previously posted essay. Nearly every year I read or rerun it, simply to get perspective on my life. During this month of Mother’s Day, I hope it provides something for you, too!

When I began my first midlife mother’s project – the art gallery show NURTURE: Stories of New Midlife Mothers – and then began writing about related topics, I was grappling with my truths: about coming into motherhood at a much later age; about my impending middle age; about the “Change of Life” and all that it brings; and about reinventing oneself and all that it means, especially once I’d gone past the century mark (sssshhhhh). […]

Aging Gracefully In A Culture That Idolizes Youth

by Beverley Golden

My mother Lillian Golden is turning 96 this year. She is vivacious and vital; has an impeccable memory, is beautiful, gracious and an inspiration to everyone who meets her. An inspiration of what aging gracefully can look like, in a culture that is obsessed with and idolizes youth.

She still lives in her own condo and is an active and integral part of the social scene in her building. She is strong, tenacious and stubborn and has never been in the hospital overnight, other than to have her children. She was well into her thirties when she had my brother Niel and I, which in those days, was considered old. […]