Midlife Foibles! Archives - Page 4 of 15

Reflections on Christmas…

by Nancy LaMar-Rodgers

You Better Watch Out…

My son’s Christmas list seems to get bigger with each passing year. I find myself longing for the days when opening a pack of play-do made him happy and he would want nothing more than to dive into the squishy stuff at hand, never paying any mind to the pile of presents that still awaited him under the tree. These days, I find myself confronted with a nine year-olds’ inquisitive mind about all subjects albeit one that he and I know he would prefer to keep in the naïve land of childhood innocence.

The Moral Dilemma

So how long do I pretend? My nineteen year-old daughter recently let me know that she was on to me by age eight because she questioned why mommy and Santa had the same handwriting. I was never one for wrapping or writing in disguise. It was always done in a mad rush a few nights before while my husband would put her to bed. I never thought to distinguish my handwriting on those ridiculous “to and from” tags bought in 100 packs at Walmart. I must say I was horrified. “Why didn’t you tell me?” I implored. “Come on Mom, admit to the “No Santa” idea? That would certainly cut down on presents.” […]

Shoes

by Marc Parsont

Our kids keep us running from sports, to birthdays, to holidays and I finally figured out that I’m in the wrong business. I should have been a shoe salesman. My daughter, “L,” dances ballet, plays soccer and appears to be on a course to pass Imelda Marcos for her shoe collection.

My son, “B,” plays soccer, started wrestling, basketball, baseball and if it’s not bad enough that each of those sports requires different footwear, it appears as if his feet have taken his body hostage. His feet must be screaming, “Feed Me Seymour,” like the plant from “Little Shop of Horrors,” because they’re growing like weeds! Kid’s shoes have always been good business, but now it has become big fashion as well. […]

My Thanksgiving Thoughts….Starting With Halloween

by Marc Parsont

“She who must be obeyed,” blames my son’s bad table manners (and manners in general) on my lack of couth and a poor upbringing. I agree that I lack myriad social graces, but my wife disagrees that my atrocious manners stem from my difficult upbringing as a single child. My brother disagrees with this interpretation as well.

(With that in mind…) I am going to use my dismal table manners to teach your family, children and adults alike, the proper way to enjoy Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving preparations begin with Halloween. Apart from problems such as stroke and coronary disease, everyone needs to start eating twice as much food as they normally do. […]

Daylight Saving Time is a Waste of My Time

by Nicholas D'Ambra

Throughout most of my adult life Daylight Saving Time meant nothing to me, save for the fact that every fall I got an extra hour of sleep. I was only mildly annoyed that I lost that same hour every spring. That was the case…until I had kids. Our daughter was born in June. Sleepless nights were the joy of our summer this year.

Having a five year old boy running around (reminding us that he doesn’t nap anymore) only made that fuzzy glow around each day that much fuzzier. There were no “nap when she naps.” By the end of September she was finally sleeping through the night. Some parents have looked at us in awe over this. Let me be clear, it was no easy feat.

We aren’t the “cry it out” parents so the Furber method was out. We are not those “extremely patient” parents so the letting-the-child-decide-when-they-are-ready-to-sleep method was out as well. […]

A Bun and A Bird In the Oven

by Nancy LaMar-Rodgers

I Just Don’t Cook

I excel at other things. Planning, making and serving large family dinners have never been one of my fortes. My family, however, had other ideas the year my dad passed away and I found myself pregnant with my son.

I was about 8 weeks in when my family thought it might be a good idea to have Thanksgiving at my house. Having never hosted a family holiday (that was my sisters’ jobs), I wasn’t sure I was up for the task but being hormonally challenged at the time, I agreed. That was my first mistake; as I undoubtedly would have to host this dinner, sober.

Murphy’s Law

So I shopped for the big bird. Strangely enough, in my newfound mindset of maternal musings, I found myself actually looking forward to this event and contemplating place settings and intricate autumnal table décor. Thankfully those latter thoughts passed quickly. […]

Why We Celebrate Birthdays (In Honor of “B’s”)

by Marc Parsont

My son, “B,” turned to me last night as he was getting ready to fall asleep, and asked why we celebrated birthdays? After doing something unusual, like actually researching a few articles online, and hold on—thinking about it for more than a minute, I came up with some really good reasons we celebrate birthdays.

We love thinking we’re younger than someone else. Joe Schmo is getting older, hard of hearing and flatulent. We haven’t gotten there yet, so obviously, we are superior to Joe Schmo. […]

Our First Real Vacation With the Twins

by DeAnna Scott

Our annual vacation for the past 11 years has not changed. My husband and I, and now with our 14 month old twins, spend our annual 10 day vacation with family and friends on Hatteras Island North Carolina. The trip is something we look forward to and plan extensively for, every year.

Although it is a sweet, tender time of reunion with our East Coast family, this year seemed to have more than its share of trouble. To be brutally honest, not at all what I would consider a vacation in the restful sense of the word.

Since the twins were 14 months old, I felt I had to be uber-prepared. For weeks I had been making lists of everything we might need for traveling, playing, eating, sleeping and swimming: lists which included entries for items such as portable high- chairs, bathing suits, clothes, sunscreen, pool toys, regular toys, sleeping arrangements, diapers, wipes, diaper cream, snacks, car seats, to name just a few. […]

My Many Holiday Thoughts….

by Marc Parsont

It’s difficult for me admit, but I’ve been taking my kids chocolate from their plastic pumpkins. I wish I could say it’s only a few pieces, but it’s not. I’m like a Viking raider plundering and pillaging. At least I was until my wife caught me.

Then both she and the nanny hid the kids candy. I found it. They caught me again and this time they threw the candy away, but not before I squirreled away a piece or two for a rainy day. I tell you this as a precursor and cautionary tale about my other favorite holiday, Thanksgiving. […]

Too Much Post-Halloween Candy? Never Fear, The Great Pumpkin Is Here!

by Melanie Elliott

Our first Halloween with The Littlest E was easy breezy. He was 15 months old and didn’t really know or care about pumpkins, costumes, going trick-or-treating, or eating candy. We stayed home that year and answered the door whenever the bell rang.

For the past few years some friends of ours whose son is The Littlest E’s age, have held a Halloween potluck. They live in a great kid-friendly neighborhood with lots of children going door-to-door. We starting going to their house when The Littlest E was a little over 2 years old. That first year attending their party, we lasted 10 minutes trick-or-treating. Our little guy was too scared of adults in costume and he didn’t even like being in his own costume. It was all a bit too much for him. […]

Autumn in the Air (Going Back)

by Maggie Lamond Simone

“I wouldn’t go back there for the world!” I said to a woman whose daughter was picking out new school stuff alongside my son.

“All I did was worry about homework and clothes, and if I wasn’t doing that, I was chasing a boy – not that I ever caught one. It was just way too much stress.”

“I know!” the woman laughed. “I’m glad this one’s only in first grade!”

“That’s when I was talking about,” I replied. She grabbed her child and fled. […]