In Vitro/Natural Childbirth Archives - Mothering in the Middle

Breastfeeding Halves Your Chances of Post-Natal Depression

by Ellie Stoneley

Can breastfeeding make you happy?

It does me, albeit, after a shaky start.

Now there is proof that it can lower your risk of depression.

A UK report says, post natal depression is more than double in women who planned to breastfeed and then were unable to, whereas the women who planned to breastfeed and then did are 50% less likely to be affected. This is significant when you consider that 1 in 10 women develop depression after the birth of a child. […]

My Birthing Experience: When I Became A Mom – For Real

by Theresa Turchin

Some mothers will say that they first felt like a mother when they saw an ultrasound of their baby for the very first time, or the moment they heard the baby’s heart beat, maybe even felt the first kick or movement their baby made inside of them.

I love and cherish all those moments. But, the moment I truly felt like a mother came in the hospital, as I was about to give birth to our son…. […]

Repercussions of a Greeting Card Holiday

by Randi Hoffman

Valentine’s Day falls in the dead of winter, and this has been one of the coldest, snowiest and wettest. Romantically, I can imagine a roaring fireplace in an isolated cabin, some brandy, no children, reading Marguerite Duras’ The Lover to each other. But I am lucky if I get some cheap chocolates and flowers from the East Village Key Food.

It is a holiday of disappointment, even if I know in the back of my head that my expectations are unrealistic. […]

“Fertility Goddess” – An Excerpt From the Book, Ghostbelly

by Elizabeth Heineman

“I am a fertility goddess,” I told Glenn. “First I get pregnant with a woman, then I get pregnant at forty-five.”

“Indeed,” Glenn said.

“Yes. If I’d lived my whole adult life with men, and at an earlier time, when they didn’t have such good birth control, I’d have six kids and six abortions behind me by now.” I am a historian of women and sexuality, and such people have no illusions about how women used to control their fertility.

“Good thing Julia saved you from that fate,” Glenn said. […]

Question: At 42 and still childless, is it time to have a baby with a sperm donor – instead of my long-term boyfriend?

I was a month shy of my 38^th birthday when I filed for divorce. I knew my biological clock was fast ticking down, and if I wanted a child I’d need to do it soon. But I was in the throes of starting my life over. I had just moved across the country, embarked on a new career and needed to put the broken piece of my heart back together. A baby would have to wait a little longer.

When I met a guy who was so much of the guy I was looking for, I tried to ignore the fact that he was less than enthusiastic about adding more kids to his family (he already had three boys ages 5, 7 and 11). At 39, I convinced myself I could wait another year and see how our relationship unfolded. Maybe he would come around. […]

Myths About Donor Egg and Donor Sperm

by Amy Demma

Myth: It isn’t your baby.

Busted!: I hear this worry from more prospective recipients of donor gametes (and donor embryo) than just about any other concern. I first address this matter in a legal context and discuss with clients that any donor (sperm, egg, embryo) should be expected to relinquish all rights to the gametes (or the embryos) as well as explicitly relinquish parental rights to children resulting from the donation. With sperm donation, this relinquishment is typically done through consents at the cryobank. With egg and embryo donation, it is recommended that relinquishment of donor rights be memorialized in a direct contract between the donor and the recipient.

Of equal concern, though, is whether or not the parent who lacks in a shared genetic connection with the child will feel a parental connection, while this should be explored with a mental health professional experienced in collaborative reproduction …the best response I have to offer is the following quote from a parent of a donor conceived child: “The child who came into my life is the most beautiful, spirited child…he is the child I was meant to have and he fills me with love every minute of the day.” […]

Facts and Myths About Infertility (from RESOLVE – the National Infertility Association)

Myth: Infertility is a women’s problem.

Fact: This is untrue. It surprises most people to learn that infertility is a female problem in 35% of the cases, a male problem in 35% of the cases, a combined problem of the couple in 20% of cases, and unexplained in 10% of cases. It is essential that both the man and the woman be evaluated during an infertility work-up.

Myth: Everyone seems to get pregnant at the drop of a hat.

Fact: More than five million people of childbearing age in the United States experience infertility. When you seek support, you will find that you are not alone. Join RESOLVE, a support group, or talk with others who are struggling to build a family, so that you won’t feel isolated. […]

The Tao of Motherhood – An Interview with Vimala McClure

With all of the demands on their time, how can Moms make time for their spiritual life?

I believe that caring for children is spiritual practice. Many people think that prayer and meditation constitute spirituality, but when you have a baby, your practice must shift; everything you do with and for your child can be spiritual practice. […]

IVF, The Spaniard and Me

by Ellie Stoneley

The solemnity with which the two medical assistants entered the room, carrying the strange long floppy syringe as if it was the Holy Grail was almost laughable … apart from the fact that for me it was the Holy Grail. The embryo about to be transferred from the depths of the syringe into my waiting and perfectly prepared womb was the most precious most longed for mass of cells in the entire universe. […]

The Midlife Biological Clock

by Jenilyn Gilbert

Dear Reader: Please meet our newest regular contributor, Jenilyn Gilbert – a fertility coach, certified yoga instructor, and adoption counselor.

As a fertility coach and someone personally trying to conceive in her 40’s, I have found that keeping an open mind and open heart around how your child comes to you can be quite the challenge when there are so many different ways to become a mother. Perhaps you’ve been trying naturally to conceive and you’re researching fertility doctors now, or you’ve done many IVF’s and the doctor is suggesting third party reproduction, or you’ve exhausted your biological efforts and are moving on to adoption. […]