As we rush by Mother’s Day and push toward Father’s Day, I’d like to remind everyone that loving your children is more important than gender. Being the primary caregiver in any relationship, male or female, isn’t easy, but using gender as the sole criteria is passé, as passé as pay phones, records (please bring vinyl back), lava lamps and politicians who believe in compromise.
Men can’t lactate or give birth, but from what I’ve heard from women, that may not be such a bad thing. The act of childbearing doesn’t always equate with good child rearing.
Men, confident, smart, caring and willing to learn and grow, can rightly take their place as primary caregivers and parents. We ignore the stares from both men and women and the snickers from men. There’s nothing wrong with us.
We can push a stroller during the day and drink a beer, play poker at night and smoke a big old stinky cigar.
We can change diapers one minute and cheer for our favorite team the next.
We love reading to our children.
We find ourselves speaking in itsy-bitsy words.
“Do you need to go potty?” is our anthem.
We love holding small hands
Wiping away small tears
Creating huge smiles
Pained to discipline
Crushed when they tell us they don’t like us
Relieved, rejoicing when they hug us and tell us they love us
Clean the house, how?
Share the chores
Cook the meals
Exhausted at the end of the day, too.
We’re “Every Man,” macho or not. When layered in vomit or poop, probably not. We’re everywhere – professional, blue collar, white collar, left our job or our job left us. We care for our children because we care and love them, not just because it’s financially better for the family. Father’s Day shouldn’t celebrate men’s ability to procreate, but men’s ability to nourish and nurture on a metaphysical level.
I will admit, though, that I’m looking forward to sleeping in and having a day to myself.
Who am I kidding?
Happy Father’s Day.