admin, Author at Mothering in the Middle

Excerpts from The Zen of Midlife Mothering – Suzanne Braun Levine

Self-Invention: The Bond Among Women of All Generations

by Suzanne Braun Levine

One thing about being an older mother is that you are constantly reminded of the truism that age doesn’t really describe the shape of a person’s life. Nor does our place on the family tree, the generation we are assigned to at birth.

When my daughter was born,I was 44 – old enough to be her grandmother. When she went to school, I was old enough to be her teachers’ (and her friends parents’) mother. At the same time,my contemporaries had long since forgotten about coping with babies and young children – they were on to the joys of grandchildren. My most meaningful cohort was other women with children my children’s age, but not my age themselves.

In other words, for most of my adult life I have belonged to no generation – or all generations. If anything defined me, it was in the trajectory of my life, not where I was in the timeline of my life. Therefore, even though the teachers were half my age, their insights about my child and their expertise about teaching made for a very intimate and respectful relationship. They had acquired an understanding of children in their short lives that I was in need of at that parenting starting point in my long life..

Isn’t Sibling Rivalry Normal?

by Phyllis Goldberg Ph.D., and Rosemary Lichtman, Ph.D.

Sibling rivalry is normal. Fights between sisters and brothers are so common that they’re often dismissed as just part of growing up. But a recent study from the University of New Hampshire finds that sibling aggression is associated with increased depression and anxiety in children.

Although physical and emotional aggression by peers is generally thought to be more serious than by siblings, the present findings showed no independent effects. That is, the results of those experiencing persistent and unmonitored aggression, whether from siblings or peers, did not differ. […]

Toddler Time at the Nature Center

by Amy Wright Glenn

In 1916, the wild Cypress Creek wetlands of Coconut Creek, Florida were drained. This morning, I drive to Fern Forest Nature Center to visit the 247 acres of what remains. I want my 22-month-old son and to see our south Florida homeland untouched by housing developments, strip malls, and busy roadways.

I park and help my little one out of the car seat. He wants to bring his “truck book” along. So, I tuck it in my backpack knowing that soon he’ll be mesmerized by tall trees, spider webs, and fish swimming in streams. It’s true. As soon as we begin walking in the woods, a calm energy surrounds us. He goes at a slow pace, soaking it all in. […]

Spring Celebration of New Life! (Wendy Sue’s Story)

by Wendy Sue Noah

Happy Spring, my friend! Isn’t it truly magnificent how Mother Nature resembles our lives, and reminds us of our own natural transitions? Like the blossoming ecstasy of new life after a cold and dark existence.

This Spring, in particular, is sensational on many levels. Why so? After many years of a cold and dark existence, my family and I are in a thrive-0-mode. Just like that lovely bush of bursting fragrant Jasmine.

This story began when I had just turned 30 years old. I was living my dream life in San Francisco. And, then, it hit me hard. “Hey, Wendy! You didn’t come here for a fun and party life. You took this birth to be of service to others ~ wake up!” I received this exact message from three different mentors during my 30^th year -an Astrologer, an Aura Picture photographer, and a Clairvoyant. […]

Easter on Bikes

by Andrea Lynn

Unlike Christmas, I’ve yet to really formally lay claim to our family traditions for Easter. So far, they’ve changed every year. Some years we travel to my parents’ house — about 6 hours away by car. We still dye eggs and hunt for candy, but my parents are not religious so there is no church.

Some years we stay home, and do a neighbourhood egg hunt, plus a hunt for chocolate on Easter morning at home, PLUS a hunt for chocolate at church on Easter morning.

I haven’t even quite managed to figure out who brings the eggs and candy and Easter basket filled with chocolate and books, new swim goggles, a fairy wand, and a plush bunny. I think the Easter Bunny brings the chocolate eggs around the house, and a hollow chocolate bunny, just as he did for me when I was a child. But I give the basket with the books and other little trinkets. No big toys — this is not going to be a second Christmas. […]

Books That Celebrate Diversity

by Carly Seifert

I’m the mom of two very different-looking children. My 5-year-old daughter has pale, porcelain skin, big blue eyes and straight blonde hair. My 1-year-old son is the color of espresso and boasts a Teeny Weeny Afro of tight, perfect ringlets.

As a transracial family in a predominantly white community, my children attract their fair share of questions and comments. I take very seriously the importance of educating and empowering my kids about their differences, helping them to recognize and celebrate what makes them unique and giving them the tools to deal with these situations as they grow. One of my favorite ways to create an open dialogue as we explore together is by reading children’s books that focus on diversity. Here are some of our favorites (and please visit my blog for reviews of more children’s titles that celebrate multiculturalism and adoption!):

1. All the Colors of the Earth by Sheila Hamanaka: This beautiful book has simple text and rich illustrations that celebrate children from all backgrounds and ethnicities, pointing out that love comes in many colors and forms.

[…]

Minimum Self-Care Requirements – An Excerpt from The Life Organizer

Jennifer Louden

Between surviving and leading a fully humming creative life lies the middle ground of determining your minimum requirements for self-care, a duded-up way of saying what you absolutely must have to stay in touch with your center.

Basic needs, or minimum requirements, are different for each woman, although getting enough sleep, moving our bodies, eating fresh food, being touched, and connecting to something larger than ourselves show up pretty consistently on women’s lists — but again, not on everybody’s.

It can be easy to discount the importance of these basics, because getting enough alone time or napping when you are tired just doesn’t sound as sexy as realizing some fabulous dream. Yet without these basics, the dreams don’t come true, or you can’t sustain them when they do, or, most tragically, it turns out that you are following not your dreams but rather a script about what you should do. […]

Excerpts from The Zen of Midlife Mothering – Valerie Gillies

Ripe

by Valerie Gillies

Here I am, sitting at the computer trying to write something coherent, while inches away my thirteen year old is melting down at the prospect of the first day of school tomorrow…

I am breathing. Deeply. Slowly. Trying to plant myself in a solid place as the door slams and the tornado comes and goes from my room. I refuse to be swept away…

Outdoors, it is a stunning evening. There are actual, real life pumpkins in my otherwise barren vegetable garden. While I rued the loss of my tomatoes and chard to deer, the vines crept around, secretly fruiting under enormous leaves. Those big, beautiful pumpkins are now turning orange…

My life is ripe. I have gone enough distance to know that the unpleasant noise and distraction of this evening is merely that. And if I can wait it out for a very short while, the chaos will give birth to opportunity…

Autumn is the season when I re-set my life. To my children, as with my earlier self, transitions are accompanied by more fear and anxiety than hope and anticipation. Without my noticing exactly when, the scales have tipped in the opposite direction. I now find times of change to be the easiest in which to do things differently—sort out, discard, clean up, and begin…

The Great Craigslist Hunt

by Aviva Luria

The hub-sand and I were proud of ourselves for not falling for what we viewed as the toddler-bed fiasco: the idea that when your baby outgrows his crib, you must buy him a cute, junior-size bed. A year or so later, your child’s head begins to press against the edge of that little rocket ship, Dora Explorer cupcake, or Thomas engine, a sign that it’s time to purchase a standard twin-size bed. […]

Perspectives in (Being) Happy

by DeAnna Scott

My new favorite song is Pharrell Williams “Happy.” I always feel so empowered and well, pretty darn happy when I hear it. I especially love the videos that he posted on his website – there is usually one person placed in a public location, like Union Station, and then, the song starts.

Soon, a person begins to move with the beat, slowly at first, sort of shy about it since they are in a public place then pretty soon the music overtakes them and they dance, clap their hands and kick their feet appearing to not give a damn what anyone thinks and completely oblivious to those around them.

I love this and feel like I am starting to embrace this attitude now the older I get. […]

About admin